Cards On The Table

I grow weary of these games mi’lady…

Always when I think I’ve caught sight of your manifestation you fade away from me…

And I do not know why.

I’m not really sure what winds are keeping my darts from hitting the bullseye.

I’m starting to believe that something far deeper is transpiring, in the heavenly realms of love and devotion.  That my struggle, and your perpetual illusiveness illuminate the instrusiveness of greater purpose in fluid motion.  That perhaps it is not you, my love with whom I do so struggle, but rather the image of that which you represent, forcibly eludes my grasp until my view is no longer muddled.  Perhaps this is a demand for clarity, a call for charity of rarity of sublimely grasped revelation.  Perhaps it is the principle I am being pressed to unwrinkle, moreso than its avatar.  Perhaps the hems will drop out, and my face will uncrinkle when I master this thing and strum the guitar.  When I become less focused on the appearance of notes in the air, and hone in on the wondrous device that placed them there… because then – then I am not led astray, or in circles after every gratifying sound.  I am not enslaved to a cadence, attempting to memorize patterns that take my enthusiasm down…

Of course this all merely speculation…

I do not fold, I’m merely showing you what I’m playing with…

There is no master plan, no ultimate scheme, that cannot be waylaid and

So I am left the course of the wild tamed – I’ve got be a Gentleman Super Saiyan.  I know it sounds stupid what I’m sayin, but I’ve got to take it to another level so I can know which way to go.  Now that I’m almost sure it is not necessarily you I am chasing, catching hold of this phantom is my goal.  A shadow of my innermost desires, echo-located through a joint heartbeat… If I can lay hold of her it may lead me to you, but if not then I’ll just strum the guitar strings… The notes will hit the air, and my queen will be there…

But for now I just sit and stare… at the wall.

My eyes are glazed over… See cuz in my heart I have new fire, but my mind is fighting staying sober.

So although I’m not sorry – I do apologize.

You played too many games with me – now I’ve attained higher eyes.

My cards are always open to you – and I will explain it all if I am able…

But for now – I must go…

I’m by no means quitting the game – just changing tables.





~The Wordsmith


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