My Snowflake

Hey… It’s me again… The window pane.  Out of all the panes on the house, I am the one that cannot easily be found.  Which is fine when the storms pour out their wrath, and the floodgates of Heaven release a vicious bath, the owners of the house don’t have to worry or be mad, because my location is so tucked away that no leaking is to be had… Unfortunately my exclusivity keeps me from the beauty that falls all around me.  I would give much to partake, and indeed I have spent many a day plotting and scheming on how to detach myself from this house which the Maker made, and adopt a new identity inwardly, to generate an entity that would be winning.  … I wanted the touch of a snowflake.

You see – I have seen many a snowflake.  Beautiful each and every one, and none are the same, and when I behold each frosty frame I come undone, wishing, dreaming, CRAVING for just – one.  Just one snowflake to land on my sill, filling me with its feel, heeling my dog barks of attention, and exposing me to a greater will… But alas it was not to be!  Year after year I focused on me, and what would it take to make a snowflake see me as tantalizing, and the telepathic waves emitted like the one’s from a radio, and occasionally I caught a snowflake who couldn’t hear in stereo…. Mono.  The snowflake only heard half of what I was saying, and applied it to all of what it desired resulting in lack of love’s resume leading it to be hired.  The snowflakes never stayed on my sill for long, for the lack of genuine spirit and truth burned like fire…. I was obsessed yes, but how could you expect anything less when the stress came from my choice of snowflakes being the best and…. the best..??

I blamed the Maker of the house, and I blamed the owners who dwelled in it.  I cast my anger up to the clouds, and despised the fact that I was made as a window pane and not something different.  Something living.  Comparison was the game  I played, because the shots of dice were already leaving holes in me, as if whoever was running things forgot there was a soul in me, and my stitching came undone – there was no more sewing me…… Until my learning escalated another level.  Until my mind powered up like a super hero in Nintendo.  I was a window pane, and a darned good one!  I didn’t need shiny paint, a new make, or a snowflake in order to make me one… I was – because I was.  I am – because I am.  And yes I wanted a snowflake like an oven wants a ham, but my fidgety nature disappeared because I was confident in who I am…

It snowed yesterday.  And I admired every single snowflake without a twinge of hurt, jealousy, bitterness or rage… I know that mine will come someday… But then – one started drifting my way.  I didn’t panic, but my breath was frantic as I tried to blow it away.  And yet ever closer it drifts… My heart lifts, in a way that none of the other flakes I burnt myself trying to persuade ever did… Every angle is uniquely unique, and the light’s refraction glitters with an internal revelation that my eyes are startled to see.  I see me – or rather I see my type.  I observe the snowflake and I observe a different style of unique design… This snowflake has thus far matched my prayer almost literally line for line… It lands.  The snowflake has landed on my sill.  Me – the out of the way, strangely different, according to the Maker’s will, possessing a different feel…

My snowflake has floated to me.  I run the risk of speaking in faith, but I believe that this is the start of the greater portion of my destiny…

**

~The Wordsmith

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