Just After

I swear I’m not thirsty… but I miss her.  It’s like we kept pace, and then soon as our eyes locked on each other’s face she faded in the distance… I was groomed to love, and trained to find my angel, but – what about the moment just after?  The magic strikes, the sparks fly, and you know.  Divine light shines through the eyes, and you’ve beheld her SOUL.  Time has froze.  I’ve tenderly kissed the tip of her nose.  No need to squint because it’s clear that it is with her that I will grow old… and then some.  Opposite of numb.  I can feel so much…. But what about the moment…

Just after?

What about that pause between connection and destiny?  The gap in time where I realize that my heartbeat has been separated from the rest of me?  I would sprint across a thousand pride lands, stroke the lengths of a dozens seas, if only I could close this chasm in between… I know that you are not my all – indeed for my everything I have God – but even God gave Adam Eve, and gifted the slaves with the the gift of free, and He has sent thee to be my key to break these shackles binding, and let out pure love from whence it has been hiding, you see – you are SHE.  Inasmuch as the Lord is the one in three, you are the million in she – a million angels, and fantasies, wrapped up in glory, and perfected purely…. I know this, but what about  the moment…

Just after?

I’m not desperate… but I am.  I’m not burning… but I am.  I am all the things I know I ought not to be, because it’s your face that I truly want to see.  Your friend, your companion, your HUSBAND I truly want to be… And one day I shall.  One day we shall be one, never to be undone.  Never to be overcome.  One to set the prototype for how the race of Kingdom Love ought to be run, but for now… what about that moment just after?  I don’t know what to do.  I mean – I’ve found you, and I’m grateful, but deep down in my cells some of my protons are hateful, because you are far removed like tacky from tasteful, and I want YOU, but I must wait… Where is the door… where is the gate?  You have healed me from my air born toxins, in an airborne way… You are my mate – you bear her name…  But this gap in time is driving me insane.  For such a moment I wasn’t trained.  Ahhhhhhhhh….. I’m done here….. I can’t wait to see you again…. My baby, my boo, my snowflake – my best friend….

I just don’t know what to do…

With this moment….

Just after.


~The Wordsmith


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