The Hurt

I’ve never known what to do with it…
Whether to ex it out as a lie or proceed with my true feelings…
Many different packages, like Christmas’ dark paradox, but the only thing I’m given is a keyless room full doors with closed locks…
Great.
A friendship with she who is my heart winning, but then misfortune curses my mobility, and now I am no longer…
She went to great lengths to assist, but at the end she left me out in the cold…
Well its not really, but my feelings are.
I didn’t ask.  Didn’t want to be a burden…
And now I’m hurtin cuz she left me out here under these stars, our pathway is now uncertain…
Maybe I don’t have a right to these feelings, but hey they chose me.
Lord knows I would gladly accept numbing healing against all this internal reeling…
And I know, I am he who conquered Jericho, and its scary though, because I thought we had a bright light, but perhaps its only a little glow…
Or maybe I DID see correctly but I must make my feelings known…
We shall never know.
And then there is the incident itself…
I am not so brash as to challenge God, but God, what the-  Heaven?
Have I misread or been blinded?
Or is there really a such thing as” that’s just life”?
… I am he who is always there, yet has no one…
The sacrifice everyone is willing to make.
I suppose none of this would be so bad, or affect me or make things worse except-
It hurts.
… And I do not know what to do with it.

**
~The Wordsmith

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